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Doctor Doctor Tab

A, B


  E              F#   A G#   E

      E                            F#
I've screwed alot of boilers, I've prodded loads of tarts,
A               G#                E
Stabbed some open wounds and I've split them all in half
  E                             F#
Knobbed a lot of women, I've stuffed a load of birds
A                 G#           F#
Shagged a lot of dogs and I've pulled a load of skirt
            B                               F#
And there's been a load of whores when I've used a bit of force,
A                         G#          F#
But they all received the benefit of sexual intercourse
         B                       F#
When they make a lot of fuss, it makes me feel sick,
      A                        B
They want a soaking gusset and a more than ample dick

 E                      A      E                     A
Doctor, I think I've got AIDS, I get laid ten times a day,
  E                          F#
I bang a lot of beaver, but let me be frank,
        A                     B
There's something up with my dick -
It hurts when I wank.

I've slammed a lot of crumpet, but its doing them some good,
If they don't like it, they can lump it, they've all been ugly tugs.
One bitch, she had a flat head, put up quite a fight,
But I found a gob to place my knob,
And a place to put my pint.
I always end up shagging a really smelly bag and getting down to business
When I just don't want to shag,

Chorus. x2

Sometimes I have to do it, lie back and think of Macc,
I'm using all this drinking time to service ugly crack.

Doctor, I think I've got AIDS, I get laid ten times a day,
I bang a lot of beaver, but let me be frank,
There's something up with my dick -
It hurts when I wank.

Macc Lads - Doctor Doctor Tab :: indexed at Ultimate Guitar.
Doctor Doctor tabs @ 911Tabs
People who played Macc Lads - Doctor Doctor Tab also played these songs by Macc Lads:
Charlotte Chords, Sweaty Betty Chords, Sweaty Beaty Tab, Boddies Chords, Failure With Girls Chords, Blackpool Tab

About the artist behind Doctor Doctor Tab:

The Macc Lads - the self proclaimed "rudest crudest lewdest drunkest band in Christendom" - formed in the late 1970s in Macclesfield, UK, playing a fusion of punk and hard rock. Their career spanned the years 1981 to 1995 and they became notorious for their foul mouthed lyrics, political incorrectness, drinking, sexism and homophobia. They managed to offend a great many people (which was the intention) and were repeatedly banned from venues and radio stations whilst retaining a die hard fan base.

They are perhaps best described as the musical equivalent of the Viz comic, sharing many of the same themes (although Splodgenessabounds claimed the same). Indeed an early Viz character Brown Bottle made his first (and thus far only) live appearance in the music video for the song Barrel's Round.

Their song lyrics cover an array of subjects, including beer, sex, chips 'n' gravy, football, fighting, and bodily functions. "Newkie Brown" beer makes an appearance in one song, as does Willies (J W Lees), but Boddingtons is the beer of choice for a true Macc Lad. And according to the Lads' songs, forcing a gay man to drink several pints of Boddingtons will change his sexual orientation. Numerous synonyms for female genitalia, sexual intercourse, and homosexuals have been coined by The Macc Lads throughout the years, which is a great source of pride. However, frontman/bassist Muttley McLad is reported to have said that his proudest achievement is rhyming "George Michael" with "menstrual cycle".

Indexed at Wikipedia.

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